Politically correct new team names for the Washington Redskins

Politically correct new team names for the Washington Redskins

Washington RedskinsWashington, D.C., councilman David Grosso says the name Washington Redskins is “racist and derogatory,” and that “it’s time to make a change.”

Grosso says a majority of his fellow councilmembers have agreed to co-sponsor the nonbinding resolution.

The team’s nickname has been the subject of renewed debate in recent months. A group of Native Americans has launched a new court battle to deny the team federal trademark protection, which would essentially force a name change.

Grosso’s resolution suggests ‘Redtails’ as a new nickname. He says it would honor the Tuskegee Airmen and allow the team to maintain its fight song and color scheme with a few minor changes.

Redtails? I’m sorry but that’s no name for a football team. Redtails connotes someone who’s arse is sore because he got whupped.

If the DC City Council is so extremely PC that they want a name change, maybe the team could pick one of these:

  • Thank God We’re Not the NY Jets: OK, it’s a little long but it’s a chant that should be heard in every NFL stadium.
  • An Animal Name? Many pro football teams have animal names: Dolphins, Jaguars, Cougars, and Super Bowl-winning Ravens. How about an animal associated with the nation’s capital such as The Lame Ducks.
  • Washington D.C. is the seat of the federal government, which has prompted teams past and present to take their names from federal institutions. Think Senators. (Yes, the current Senators reside in Ottawa, but they are part of the National Hockey League.) Football is a sport with large menacing athletes, so perhaps they could adopt the name The Bloated Bureaucracy.
  • Or since Washington, D.C., is the center of American politics, perhaps the team could take on a name related to politicians like The Hacks or The Spinners.
  • Tampa Bay has the Buccaneers, and Oakland has the Raiders. Following this them, I thought Washington could have The Stealers, but that won’t work because it’s too close to the Pittsburgh team. But how about The Taxers or even The Redistributors?
  • Baseball’s Nationals took the name because D.C. is the capital of our country. Nationals seems a bit soft for a football team. At first I thought of The Constitutions, but realized that won’t work because no one in D.C. knows what the Constitution is. But how about something tougher, such as Criminally Trespassing Aliens, which avoids the anti-PC term illegal aliens and certainly sounds tough.
  • There is the possibility of calling them the RG3s. After all RGIII is the franchise.
  • Or how about taking a number? After all the 49ers have a long history of winning football. Why not call the team the Washington 17 Trillions? The problem with this name is the team will have to change its name each year, at least as long as Obama is president.
  • The press is a big industry in Washington, so what about changing the team’s name to The President’s Butt-Kissers? Nah, again too soft to be football.

Note to Chuck Hagel: If Redskins is offensive, then your suggestion for an alternative — The Jewish Lobby — won’t work either.

There is one last option. Since there are teams with the name of an occupation associated with their city (think Dallas Cowboys), how about calling the Washington team the Ridiculously PC City Councils?

Back to you, Councilman Grosso.

Jeff Dunetz

Jeff Dunetz

Jeff Dunetz is editor and publisher of the The Lid, and a weekly political columnist for the Jewish Star and TruthRevolt. He has also contributed to Breitbart.com, HotAir, and PJ Media’s Tattler.

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