“That’s one small step for man, one giant step for a cosmic caliphate.”
Such an announcement, or something like it, could trip off the tongue of the next citizen of planet Earth to set foot on the surface of the moon: Astronaut Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. Iranian state media reported on Monday that the Iranian President declared “I am ready to be the first Iranian to be sacrificed by the scientists of my country and go into space.” Amen to the sacrifice part anyway.
Ahmadinejad made his offer to boldly go where no Iranian has gone before during an address to scientists on this, Iran’s national day of space technology in Tehran.
The offer follows last week’s announcement that Iran successfully sent a monkey to space. According to the report, the simian reached an altitude of 75 miles before returning to Earth unharmed.
The BBC optimistically notes that “western nations have expressed concern that Iran’s space programme is being used to develop long-range missiles” which “could potentially be used to carry nuclear warheads,” adding that “Iran denies it is seeking to develop nuclear weapons and insists its nuclear programme is solely for peaceful purposes.”
Like launching monkeys into space. Or worms. In 2010, Iran reportedly succeeded in sending one of the slimy creatures into space, along with a rat. Ahmadinejad would fit right in.
As to Iran’s peaceful intentions, the petty tyrant seemed to put the lie to that claim last September, when he stood behind the podium at the U.N. General Assembly and asked God to bring “a new order” that “will do away with … everything that distances us.” He later enlarged on his remarks, fearing that it was not sufficiently clear that he meant reducing the “Zionist state” to an “historical footnote.”