Kindergartner suspended for threatening to 'shoot' a classmate with bubbles

Kindergartner suspended for threatening to 'shoot' a classmate with bubbles

Drop your weapon and assume the position!

She’s forever blowing bubbles, and now a 5-year-old from Mount Carmel, Pa., has been suspended after threatening to turn her “weapon” — a gun that blows bubbles — on a fellow kindergartner.

The website has the latest example of a school overreacting to a “terrorist threat” committed with a non-weapon. The site reported on Friday that the deadly incident occurred while the child was waiting in line for a school bus.

Talking with a friend, the girl said something to the effect ‘I’m going to shoot you and I will shoot myself’ in reference to the device that shoots out bubbles. The girl did not have the bubble gun with her and has never shot a real gun in her life, [said attorney Robin] Ficker [who represents the girl’s family].

Officials in the Mount Carmel Area School District got wind of the exchange and questioned the girls for 30 minutes. Neither had a parent present. After completing their investigation, the administration was satisfied that the little girl had violated school safety policy and suspended her for ten days. They also added the requirement that the child (who is obviously criminally insane) be evaluated by a psychologist.

“This little girl is the least terroristic person in Pennsylvania,” said Ficker, who was retained after the child’s mother read that he had handled the case of another psychopathic child across the border in Maryland. Ficker suggested that the mom ask the principal to expunge the record. The school refused, though they agreed to reduce the suspension to days and to change the reason to “threat to harm another student.”

School district solicitor Edward Greco said on Friday that the allegations are being looked into, but neither he nor school officials were willing to comment on the disciplinary actions that were being taken. Greco and Ficker acknowledged they are trying to arrange a meeting next week to discuss the situation.

Although supporters of zero tolerance will probably disapprove of the school’s willingness to lessen the punishment, they can claim a secondary victory in the fact that the bubble gun was described in the news story as pink. Chalk one up for gender-sensitive toy making, even if the toy was – ugh! – a gun.

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Howard Portnoy

Howard Portnoy

Howard Portnoy has written for The Blaze, HotAir, NewsBusters, Weasel Zippers, Conservative Firing Line, RedCounty, and New York’s Daily News. He has one published novel, Hot Rain, (G. P. Putnam’s Sons), and has been a guest on Radio Vice Online with Jim Vicevich, The Alana Burke Show, Smart Life with Dr. Gina, and The George Espenlaub Show.


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