Enough of scandals being named after Watergate

Enough of scandals being named after Watergate

ss-gulf-of-tonkin-1227296814905737-9-thumbnail-4Ever notice how many scandals and supposed scandals have -gate tacked on to their hindquarters? Ordained by the largely hard-left media, the -gate suffix has been placed into journalistic canon as a constant reminder to the sheeple/low information voters of Watergate and the administration of defrocked Republican President Richard M. Nixon.

The latest occurrence of gateism to strike is the still-developing Bridgegate, the closing for spite by a member of Gov. Chris Christie’s inner circle of a handful of traffic lanes on the George Washington Bridge (which is a FUBAR on the best of days).

Looked upon by at least one ex-staffer (maybe more) as payback aimed at the mayor of Ft. Lee, NJ for backing Christie’s Democrat opponent in the recent gubernatorial race, the story was barely out of the traces (make that gate) before the Bridgegate moniker was slapped on the offense by The Washington Post, the ABC affiliate in Philadelphia, CNN’s Piers Morgan — and even our own clearly-in-need-of-a-vacation LU staff.

Let’s be honest, shall we? The Watergate burglary was a 3rd-rate comedy of errors. Hardly the scandal of the century as Pravda on the Hudson wants to convince us it is.

Say what you will about Dick Nixon, but the fact of that matter is Nixon never had prior knowledge of the break-in. Never.

Yet he was one of those few politicians that actually believed that loyalty is a two-way street. That’s when the WWII vet did what he could to protect his people. Hence, the Watergate coverup, and in its wake, the downfall of the Nixon Presidency.

But I Digress…

Now if we REALLY want to give a proper suffix to governmental corruption and scandals in general, how about we name them all after a REAL fraud perpetrated on the American people which resulted in almost 60,000 dead Americans in a 10-year war in Southeast Asia? And orchestrated by a Democrat President and Democrat Congress, no less.

I propose that all future scandals be named after The Gulf of Tonkin Resolution.

Can’t you see it now? Instead of Filegate, history books would identify the illegal possession and scrutiny of 300-900 FBI files by the Clinton Administration without the file’s subject’s permission The Gulf of Files.

Monicagate, named after intern Monica Lewinsky, who had an “inappropriate relationship” with the then-U.S. President Bill Clinton and a Gurkha Grand Reserve cigar, would be The Gulf of Monica.

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Hookergate, named for a group of Secret Service agents who indulged in horizontal recreation with certain ladies of the evening while on advance security detail in Columbia would be The Gulf of Hookers.

My personal favorite — Shot-in-the-face-gate — might prove a little ubwieldy for the new naming system. The reference of course is to the controversy surrounding then-Vice President Dick Cheney’s accidental shooting of Republican lawyer Harry Whittington during a quail-hunting trip in February 2006 and the suspected cover up.

Two Totally Unrelated Side Notes…

  1. With the upcoming release of former Secretary of Defense Robert Gates’s tell-all memoirs, where’s the media with Gatesgate?
  2. As Greg Gutfeld correctly pointed out concerning The Gulf of Bridge, the Democrats best be careful not to stir-up controversies concerning bridges.

T. Kevin Whiteman

T. Kevin Whiteman

T. Kevin Whiteman is a retired Master Sergeant of Marines. He is the founder of the blog Unapologetically Rude and has written for Examiner and other blogs.

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