To help her ‘kick the habit,’ woman assaults cop so she will be taken to jail

To help her ‘kick the habit,’ woman assaults cop so she will be taken to jail

Etta Mae Lopez

What would you do if you had a burning urge (pun intended) to quit smoking? Although it’s pretty far down on the list of remedies for most people, one course of action would be to have yourself thrown in the slammer, where you would be denied access to cigarettes.

As for the question of how you go about getting yourself arrested, the solution for 31-year-old Etta Mae Lopez of Sacramento was to wait outside the County sheriff’s department for a police officer to emerge, then, when one did, to come upside his head.

The Daily Mail reports that Lopez tried out her plan this past Tuesday — and it worked. Her chance target was Deputy Matt Campoy. As he exited the main jail at the end of his shift, a small woman smacked him in the face. A startled Campoy grabbed the woman’s arm and took her inside the jail, where she slapped him again as soon as he turned her loose.

Once she was handcuffed, the 5-foot 1-inch Lopez told Campoy she picked him because he was in uniform and she wanted to make sure she struck a law enforcement officer.

‘She waited all day for a deputy to come out because she knew if she assaulted a deputy she would go to jail and be inside long enough to quit her smoking habit,’ Campoy told The Sacramento Bee.

Campoy says he tried to sidestep Lopez as he left the jail but that she blocked his path and then belted him. At least the deputy’s sense of humor was unaffected by the punch. “I’ve been telling everybody,” he quipped, “that I have a new Irish name: Nick O’Derm.”

Lopez pleaded no contest to misdemeanor battery on a peace officer and was sentenced Thursday to 63 days in jail, with credit for the three days she served since her arrest. She was also sentenced to an additional five days for violating her probation from a 2010 drunken driving conviction.

She was also ordered by the judge to have “no contact” with deputies. Here’s hoping for her sake that her only addiction is to tobacco.

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Howard Portnoy

Howard Portnoy

Howard Portnoy has written for The Blaze, HotAir, NewsBusters, Weasel Zippers, Conservative Firing Line, RedCounty, and New York’s Daily News. He has one published novel, Hot Rain, (G. P. Putnam’s Sons), and has been a guest on Radio Vice Online with Jim Vicevich, The Alana Burke Show, Smart Life with Dr. Gina, and The George Espenlaub Show.

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