News-making street denizen Jeffrey Hillman has just begun his third 15 minutes of Warholian fame. Hillman became the poster boy for charity and good will toward men back in mid-November when a kindhearted New York City police officer bought him a $100 pair of boots at a Skechers outlet.
Jeffrey Hillman (courtesy of Robert Caplin, New York Times)
Hillman made headlines again this past Saturday, when it was reported that his estranged family learned for the first time about his plight as a homeless man by reading about it in the New York Post.
On Sunday he was back in the news a third time. He was barefoot once more, but this time he also had his hand out. The whereabouts of his footwear tell a sad story about the unwritten and unruly code of life on the street. His outstretched hand tells a galling story of greed and the American dream gone bad.
First, the fate of his boots. “Those shoes are hidden,” Hillman told The New York Times. “They are worth a lot of money. I could lose my life.” It’s a pitiful catch-22. If he wears the boots, his safety and well-being are compromised. If he keeps them in hiding instead of on his feet, he risks the consequences of a brutal city winter.
Hillman, the article notes, is grateful for his gift. But he is not without sin or guile. That is clear from another message he delivered to reporters:
I was put on YouTube, I was put on everything without permission. What do I get? This went around the world, and I want a piece of the pie.
One sort of hopes that this chapter of the story marks its conclusion. Don’t be surprised, however, if Jeffrey Hillman is back. And don’t be shocked if he is in the company of a copyright lawyer and an agent.
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What a perfect lesson in the counter productiveness of extending help to those who do not want to learn how to fish but demand that they be given a fish every day…
Tragically, the moral lesson here is unneeded by those capable of understanding and willfully denied by those most supportive of liberal bromides.
He has retained the services of an attorney by the name of Sandra …don’t recall her last name but it rhymes with duck. She’s promised to get him, and all those in his predicament, a lifetime supply of Johnson Murphy 2-tone black and brown lace ups. (For his upcoming congressional testimony.)
Shoes ARE more importants than condoms…except in the kitchen. In the kitchen, you don’t want to spill pico de gallo on an unprotected “Melvin.” Toes? No problem.
This is how the world ends, Howard. The Four Horsemen plus Sandra.
Steven
Unprotected “Melvin”? Is that what you wrote, Steven? You do know we have profanity filters here. Consider yourself lucky its back was turned when you posted that phrase.
On a serious note, didn’t the Sandra you mention give herself to the Four Horsemen? Or didn’t she consider them “sponge-worthy”?
I ain’t believin’ this story.
Not that what you wrote is bad, just the main character.
You could be right, cozmo. After it was written, my son reminded me there was a South Park episode about Internet money: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EY6fp95uGfM
More money to go with what he already made selling, or trading, the boots in the first place. Going shoeless worked pretty good the first time.
There is an entire
industrysegment of our economy devoted to giving stuff away to those less fortunate.I see it every effin’ day.
Not to be picky so soon, but I really miss preview.
Just another thing to add to the b list.
Please keep the reminders coming of features you’d like us to add. We already have our people working on user-friendlier formatting tags. We’ll definitely add “previewing.”
I guess the boot straps were too much of a temptation for Mr. Hillman. And how does he know he’s on YouTube? Is Obama giving away smart phones now?
Sorry. I denounce myself in advance.
As to formatting pedantics: How about a link at the bottom of each page that takes you back to the Home page?
Consider it added to the list.
Consider it added to the list.
And a pony
Yeah, all right. Sheesh. The on-screen martini dispenser isn’t enough??
. . . doesn’t look like we’re getting a pony.
I am stunned that such a wonderful story can lurch over into the realm of the disgraceful so quickly.
Seems like that happens a lot.
Well, the cop will be doubtless be more cynical; The shoeless man probably indeed cannot wear the boots without fear of getting beat up and robbed of them; and yes, he probably does get given more money without shoes than with.
A long time ago I actually did see a guy without shoes as I was leaving my workplace on a cold, darkening Christmas eve. The sight stuck with me; the situation was pretty poignant. The guy was making noises and moaning as if he was mentally quite disturbed; people were stepping around him as they passed by. This was after the ACLU began suing to prevent involuntary commitment to mental institutions. It took me a moment to realize this man did not seem to have enough wits to be able to find his shoes and put them back on if he was given some. That town, Jacksonville, Florida had shelters and missions all over the rundown parts of downtown. There were hot meals, warm safe places to sleep, counselors, work opportunities and a genuine Christian message of redemption and hope. It is not that people were not trying to help; some people are just very hard to truly help, pity them or have compassion on them as you may.
Dogberry:
And also, the watch heard them talk of one Deformed: they say be wears a key in his ear and a lock hanging by it, and borrows money in God’s name, the which he hath used so long and never paid that now men grow hard-hearted and will lend nothing for God’s sake: pray you, examine him upon that point.
. . . if you see what I’m saying.
At least I assumed the best. Once again, I look like an idiot, and once again, I have to make a conscious decision to continue to assume the best, knowing full well I will likely — but not necessarily — look like an idiot again tomorrow.
My father taught me that when a bum asks for money offer the buy them a sandwich instead so they can’t use the money for booze and drugs, which is probably why they are homeless to begin with. It’s good advice.