It's a trifecta!

It's a trifecta!

KerryTo all right wing-nut conspiracy freaks: you have just been proved completely and utterly wrong. President Barack Obama has nominated, for three national security cabinet positions, not long-time, semi-known ideologues from the far left fever swamps, but…well-known national figures with dozens of years of experience under their belts.

There are, however, a few anomalies that could cause friction, either in the nomination process or when these individuals take office. Here’s a heads-up on the most obvious ones.

— Flash mobs may attack the homes of journalists who refer to the Senate as “the world’s greatest deliberative body.” The cognitive dissonance will be too great as the public finds out how former Senators Barack Obama, Joe Biden, John Kerry and Chuck Hagel actually reach decisions and what those decisions are.

— Expect considerable tension between Biden and Hagel. They’re tied right now for wrong calls in foreign policy. Biden, if you remember, wanted to split Iraq into three parts in 2007, while Hagel in 2008 endorsed engagement with Syria and Iran. Intramural rivalry within the proposed new administration on foreign policy could produce new lows for the history books.

Karadzic— There’s always a natural rivalry between State, Defense and CIA, but expect even more than the usual friction due to hair envy. Kerry’s fine head of hair is worthy of a Serbian war criminal. I wouldn’t expect either Hagel or Brennan to forgive or forget that.

— Brennan, in his current job as Deputy National Security Adviser, presumably knows a lot about the administration cover-up of the attack at the so-called consulate in Benghazi that cost the lives of three CIA operatives. Now he’s going to be the boss of the CIA. Gee, I wonder how CIA employees feel about that one?

— But at least you don’t have to worry about gender issues intruding into national security and foreign policy. No women considered after Susan Rice went down in flames, and gay rights activists’ complaints about Hagel brushed aside. Whew!

— Brennan’s nomination also does away with pesky little problems like the legality of drone strikes (despite a UN investigation of same). We’ll be able to keep on killing terrorists (oops – militants!), as identified by Obama’s kill list, rather than interrogating them to find out more about the plans of Islamic terrorists (oops – can’t combine those two words!) or violent Islamists (nope – that term’s on the way out too). If that doesn’t make you feel secure, I don’t know what would.

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