[Ed. – Any bets? In the real world, I’m thinking California. Hasn’t been much controversy about the vote here, since we already get Communist-style election results. And the high card has got to be the 20-plus million unsolicited ballots mass-mailed for the 2020 general election, which is probably an unprecedented “Cook the Vote!” event for any place on the planet. Awe-inspiring. UPDATE: Reported Monday night: MLB has selected Colorado to host the game. We’ll see. Apparently Colorado’s voting laws are already stricter than Georgia’s new law.]
Spokespeople for Major League Baseball announced today that the All-Star Game this summer will be moved from Atlanta, due to its egregious voting laws, to a Uyghur prison camp yard, where there aren’t any bad voting laws at all.
The game will be held in the spacious prison yard, which features a tall barbed-wire fence and a modest outfield. The venue features lots of free labor, so every role from the ball boys to the concession vendors won’t cost the league a dime. In fact, the workers are already happily chalking the baselines and tending the grass, since if they don’t, they will be murdered.
“We must move the All-Star game to a place that shares our values,” said MLB Commissioner Rob Manfred.