In which the moon is mislabeled, and syntax is bruised and battered

In which the moon is mislabeled, and syntax is bruised and battered

[Ed. – Check it out before they correct it.  The title slug for this post on the Slate main page reads “Isaac Mizrahi Couldn’t Decide if the Moon Were [sic] a Star or a Planet.  It was Glorious.”  I’m rooting for Mizrahi in this one.]

If you fancy yourself an aficionado of camp—the aesthetic sensibility associated with gay people, not the place with tents and s’mores—like I do, you should be watching gay designer Isaac Mizrahi’s show on QVC. Called, naturally, Isaac Mizrahi LIVE!, the show features Mizrahi and co-host Shawn Killinger hawking various garments, shoes, and accessories while models process awkwardly around the pair as if taking part in some sort of garish stripmall cakewalk. … Palpably middlebrow callers are occasionally tolerated, and discussions of “infinity scarves” and other objets d’kitsch often devolve into the peculiar syntactic fantasia (remember “a treat is happening”?) for which QVC is famous. Suffice it to say, I have passed many an evening with only a bottle of wine and this program for entertainment. …

Tape of a recent segment of the show surfaced on the Internet earlier this week, in which…Killinger and Mizrahi wish to determine if the moon is a planet or a star—forgetting the incidentally correct option that it is, you know, a moon. …

Here are my favorite three lines, presented without attribution to enhance the poetry:

“The moon is a planet, darling … the moon is such a planet.”
“There was Uranus and there was Saturn and there was the one with the rings on it … alright here look, this is key lime.”
“The moon is what? The moon is a natural satellite? What’s that mean? Is that what Google said? No, I don’t like that at all.”

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