Lose the geese, already. They’re horrible

Lose the geese, already. They’re horrible
Massing for attack. (Image: Shutterstock)

[Ed. – Cromwell is right about the droppings.]

Snakes, even the venomous ones, serve a purpose. They eat rodents that like to come in the house for a bite to eat, for just one example, and if “Lion King” taught us anything it was something about the circle of life. Snakes also prefer to leave you alone so long as you leave them alone. …

Geese, on the other hand, are actually horrible and deserving of hatred and scorn. They’re big, nasty beasts. They serve no purpose, they’re disgusting, and they definitely do not prefer to leave you alone. You don’t even have to pick them up or accidentally step on them to experience their wrath. …

To begin with, geese are entitled jerks…they’re vile panhandlers that won’t take “no” for an answer. …

There’s also the end result of all that bread and tears—droppings so heinous and destructive that salted earth says, “I could have it worse.” It doesn’t just annihilate everything it touches; it’s also green, gross, and splattery, found everywhere within a 30-mile radius of geese, and it’s chock-full of disease and germs and nightmares.

Continue reading →


Commenting Policy

We have no tolerance for comments containing violence, racism, vulgarity, profanity, all caps, or discourteous behavior. Thank you for partnering with us to maintain a courteous and useful public environment where we can engage in reasonable discourse.

You may use HTML in your comments. Feel free to review the full list of allowed HTML here.