[Ed. – Max Power and Handsome B. Wonderful were taken.]
No matter what the happiness-stomping basement-dwellers of the Internet say, they can’t take this away from her: She is Sexy.
Sexy Ranea Crabtree got her new name in court yesterday, during the briefest of hearings before Licking County Probate Judge Robert Hoover. The Pataskala woman had requested to legally ditch her first name, Sheila, which she hated so much she’d only refer to it as Ugly.
She walked into court yesterday morning in a summery dress splashed with bursts of orange and yellow. You could barely see her trembling.
“What is your reasoning behind changing your first name to Sexy?” the judge asked her.
“I feel like I’m a free-spirited person, I love to have fun, and this is the last piece to make my life complete,” she said.
And then Hoover asked whether her teenage daughters and her husband, the latter of whom joined her in court, approved of the change. She said yes. And it was over.